As American as Torta alla Mela

There are Americans that love Italy and Italians that love America. I don't mind either group. But Italians who insist that everything in Italy is better yet surround themselves with Yankee goods ruffle my American (Indian) feathers.

I've stood through proud demonstrations of my friends' frigoriferi americani (American fridges). They're thrilled with the immensity and usually conclude the tour with, "And it even makes ice!" It's hard not to remind them that they used to boast of their daily trips to the market for fresh vegetables and fruit (for which a giant fridge is unnecessary) and that when we're out for dinner they order their beverages at temperatura ambiente because drinking things cold can cause congestione (something like cramps that can kill you).  And it's especially difficult  to refrain from asking why they aren't worried that their giant fridge could lead to obesity, a perpetual prejudice against an entire population.  

The most important thing outside Italians' kitchens is inside their closets. Italians are known for their style. Train conductors, bus drivers and shopkeepers all provide their services with panache. As a visitor in the 90s I wrote about the population's polished shoes and well-pressed 'everything else'. Unfortunately, current fashion trends reek of Rocky instead of Mr. Rogers. What was once a Fruit of the Loom sweatsuit now costs 500 dollars and has to be ironed.

I have a student that said I couldn't deny that Italian fashion was better than American. She said Milan is the fashion capital of the world and reminded me that Gucci, Fendi and someone else important were all Italian. I agreed that many of the top designers came from Italy and that some of the most famous fashion shows were in Milan. And then I commented on her outfit that started with Stan Smiths (sneakers) and ended with a Carharrt hat. (There was probably a pair of Levi's in between, but I can't remember.) Next I questioned the comfort of her Adirondack chair and the convenience of her Weber grill. I refrained from reminding her that she was also taking (American) English lessons.  

If you're cool in Italy, guess who caters your 30th birthday party. A food truck that serves burgers and fries, not pasta. Your 40th might be the theme of your favorite American series on Netflix. Your 50th? The trend seems to be a 70s party with a lot of signs that say peace and love, not pace and amore. And the party's sure to be Stayin'Alive, Stayin'Alive with a few Rhinestone Cowboys and the YMCA crew.

Italians of all ages love sunglasses. In 1999 Italy's Luxottica bought RayBan, formerly owned by American Bausch & Lombe. That's probably the year the logo over-appeared on both stems and lenses. Maybe that's what has blurred so many Italians' vision. Or perhaps they're not using eye protection mode on their iPhones, (which I needn't remind you are not produced by a company called Mela).