Coronavirus Delivery

Just when I thought I had nothing else to write about and I was putting the final punctuation on the previous post, the delivery man pulled up.  Due to the fact that I have no doorbell attached to a gate at the end of my driveway because I have no gate (https://10leaves.blogspot.com/2014/07/lions-and-tigers-and-bears-oh-my-gates.html)  FedEx trucks can pull right up.

A private delivery truck in the driveway is usually a good sign. It saves me a trip to the Italian post office which often involves at least a 30-minute wait. In the past it also meant paying 15 to 25 euros in customs fees for packages from the States filled with marshmallows, Libby's pumpkin pie mix and Heath bars. But my favorite postman informed me that filling out the paperwork differently in the States meant I could stop paying for my gifts once they got to Italy.  So I informed my friends and it seems to be working.  The recent Reese's Peanut Butter Cup delivery was free. 

Fortunately, after years of roasting an array of Italian marshmallows, I've finally found some that seem to puff just like Kraft Jet-Puffed.  As for the Libby's, I've tried cooking a real pumpkin but decided it's too much work.  And I've recently found canned pumpkin, but instead of 100% Calabaza Pura (why is that written in Spanish right above "America's Favorite Pumpkin"?) it's only 82% pumpkin with some other added ingredients.  I've made a few pies and they're not so bad, but my Italian friends aren't big fans.  In my opinion it's because there's no Cool Whip. 

My normal 'delivery truck panic' involves the fact that maybe I'm still in my pajamas with unbrushed teeth and hair (even though my hair is never really brushed).  This time a different panic set in..... how to keep a Coronavirus courier a safe distance from your door.  As soon as he stepped out of the van I told him that he had just arrived at the house of the woman most frightened by the Coronavirus in all of Italy.  He smiled and kept approaching.  They're not used to hearing an American accent and they have to get used to me before they understand.   So I said it again, waving my arms for him to keep his distance.

Unfortunately he had to pass the package and I had to sign for it, so the transaction may have been wireless, but it couldn't be touchless.  I asked him to drop the package on the step telling him I'd open it with gloves later.  As for the signature, we both laughed when he offered me his pen.  I pulled mine from my ponytail and scribbled on the paper as it blew in the wind. He was intrigued to find an American living in this small town in northern Italy and ready with questions to which I replied, "You're the cutest delivery driver I've ever seen and I can't believe I'm sending you away so quickly."  It sounded almost as suave as an Italian casanova.  But that would have been, "You're the cutest delivery driver I've ever seen and even the Coronavirus won't keep me from you." 

If anyone ever figures out how to send me Cool Whip, hopefully I'll have the same delivery guy.  And even if it arrives through the regular mail, I'd be willing to pay the customs.