Outrunning is no key to befriending

Who wants to be outrun by a girl?  Maybe no one.  I was doing my Luxembourg laps when I heard someone close behind me.  Unless I go in the dark, there is always someone close behind me.  But this seemed closer than usual.  I could hear the panting.  Naturally, I seemed to speed up.  (Wouldn't you, if someone was running behind you and panting?) They sped up, too.

Sometimes I do two laps of the garden and then head to the Seine and run on the cobblestones.  It's probably not the healthiest or easiest thing to do, but I'm in Paris and I'm going to run on the Seine.  This day, I decided to try one more lap with my new friend in tow.  I've done this in Chicago and it always has a happy ending.  My favorite was a girl that I'd checked out (yes, I check out female runners) on my way north.  I thought to myself that I'd be happy to look like her.  So, on my way south, I heard someone close behind.  Naturally, I sped up but they did, too.  I'd slow a bit when I couldn't keep up the pace, with hopes that they'd pass me and the game would be over, but they slowed down, too.  When I finally stopped for water, the girl that I'd checked out stopped for water with me and said, "Thanks for being my jack rabbit." 

I don't know what I thought I'd wanted from my new Luxembourg friend because I certainly wouldn't have understood "jack rabbit" in French.  Running a half-marathon in Italy 6 years ago my answer to unsolicited comments was, "I'm sorry I don't speak Italian," which only caused interest for more comments and by the end I was speaking Italian and had new friends.  Maybe I'd just try the usual.  "Je suis desole.  Je ne parle pas francais," and we'd go from there.

Lap two.  Completed.  Still panting.

Lap three.  Completed.  Still panting.  And now I'm panting, too.  What am I trying to prove?  If they do say anything, I probably won't be able to utter my standard French phrase.  Okay.  I'll do one more lap.  But if nothing happens, I'm going home.

Three quarters of the way through lap four I'm not being chased anymore.  I slow down just in case they're back there somewhere hoping to catch up.  Still nothing.  It's my chance to stop and breathe and think about how silly I'd been.  Voila!  There he was.  Sweaty, exhausted and panting.  Say something.  Say something.  I just said, "Merci," and smiled and he slowly ran past and didn't say merci and didn't smile.  My jack rabbit had been behind me instead of in front of me,  and he wasn't very friendly.  The next time he's back there I know just what I'll say.  "Hit the road, Jack."  Then I'll only run two laps and won't miss my morning at the Seine.